Never Not Funny: The Jimmy Pardo Podcast

Dennis Hensley - How To Survive a Space Mission & a Madonna Audition

·1 hr 22 min·5 clips

Jimmy Pardo presents an episode where Dennis Hensley recounts his failed audition to be a backup dancer for Madonna's Blonde Ambition tour.

The episode begins with host Jimmy Pardo promoting a Babbel language learning deal before introducing a curated episode from the podcast 'How to Survive', hosted by Danielle Koenig and Christine Kimmel. The first segment of the featured episode is a comedic educational breakdown on surviving a space mission. The hosts discuss the statistical dangers, citing a 3% fatality rate for space travel, which is higher than extreme sports like wingsuit jumping. They list five primary hazards: space radiation, isolation and confinement, distance from Earth, gravity fields, and hostile closed environments. The hosts illustrate these points with the real-life story of astronauts Butch Wilmore and Suni Williams, who were stranded on the International Space Station for nine months in 2024 due to Boeing Starliner malfunctions. After a break with ads for Factor meals and PESTI pest control, the show transitions to its guest interview. Dennis Hensley joins to discuss how to survive a Madonna audition. He details seeing an ad in Variety in January 1990 for 'fierce' male dancers for Madonna's upcoming Blonde Ambition tour. Hensley attended the open audition at Landmark Studios in Hollywood but was quickly cut after a simple dance combination. Inspired by the absurdity of the experience, he wrote a humorous essay about it. After sending query letters to magazines, his story was published in Movieline, launching his career as an entertainment writer. Years later, he got to interview Madonna in a roundtable and told her she was the reason he became a writer. The conversation shifts to Hensley's later life; in his late 50s, he took a jazz class and was scouted by a dance agent. After some awkward modern auditions, he eventually booked a commercial for Las Vegas tourism, dancing at Circus Circus. He notes that in that year, he made more money from dancing than writing. The episode concludes with Hensley promoting his new party game 'Search Party' and the hosts doing ad reads for Quince clothing.

As heard by us

A space-trip worry, a wingsuit refusal, and a stubborn "polling place" bit turn ordinary language into the engine of the episode.

Space travel becomes a problem of timing and nerve: a week away somehow stretching into nine months, Avenue 5 entering the chat, family viewing habits getting audited, and a wingsuit jump losing badly to orbit.

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Why you'd press play

Press play for nine months in space, a hard pass on wingsuit jumping, and a tiny argument over the words "polling place."

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