LAUNCH: Parenting Tips for Raising Adult Children & Building Better Relationships · Shari Jonas - Parenting Consultant, Educator and Author

#70: How to Tell If Your Adult Child Has a Video Gaming Addiction | A 30-Year-Old Shares His Story of Recovery

·1 hr 4 min·2 clips

I dropped from 180 to 120 pounds—a skeleton—starving myself while gaming through the night, slowly killing myself without realizing it.

A parent may spot the gaming first. Jake asks them to look under it, because the pull toward gaming can come from fears, concerns, and trauma that feel harder to face directly. Enjoyment is one thing. Escape is another. For him, gaming gave his brain something energetic and absorbing, which made it easier to dodge difficult emotional experiences. Shari slows that down for parents. She hears someone hiding from something, possibly depression, anxiety, isolation, or another source of distress. Jake names three big circles: depression, anxiety, and isolation. He says an addict is often sitting in at least two of them. His own example is plain and specific. He was isolated in a far off campus location, away from high school friends, family, and everyone else. That isolation fed what he calls a world of lies, until reaching out for help and support felt impossible. Depression was already there. Anxiety had been diagnosed too, and he had not built the tools to handle the fear and concern that came with it. Recovery took support. Jake says counseling and a university psychologist helped him learn many of those tools during a three year recovery period. Shari keeps asking the parent questions: what does gaming do for someone who is depressed and anxious, and what happens when isolation takes over? The practical warning is direct. If an adult child games beyond enjoyment, look for trauma, depression, anxiety, and isolation beneath the screen.

As heard by us

A grounded look at gaming as escape, not just habit.

For parents trying to make sense of an adult child who seems stuck, this conversation looks past the gaming and toward what may be driving it.

Read the full review in PlayNext →

Why you'd press play

You want a clearer way to tell ordinary struggle from something deeper.

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →

Listen to the show on

Apple Podcasts Spotify

Play clips from this episode More from LAUNCH: Parenting Tips for Raising Adult Children & Building Better Relationships