Is My Child A Monster? A Parenting Therapy Podcast · Leslie Cohen-Rubury

Karen Part 1 of 3: Tailoring Technology Strategies To Fit Your Child’s Needs

August 19, 2025·45 min·2 clips

Leslie opens by naming the pattern in Karen’s home: the same tech boundary lands very differently with each child. Kate, the 10-year-old, is more likely to finish what she is doing. Vivian, 8, is more likely to sneak in extra time. Owen, 5, reacts with anger when the limit is enforced. That difference sets the tone for the whole conversation. Leslie keeps the focus on seeing each child as an individual instead of using one rule as if it will work the same way for all three. The episode follows on from a previous discussion with technology expert Max Dossel about what the phone is doing to a child’s brain and why it matters to understand a child’s perspective before making changes. Here, the focus shifts from understanding the issue to working through it inside one family. Karen describes how one child already knows that sports days mean less technology. Leslie picks up on that and asks whether the oldest child could help lead the transition by finishing a game and saving time for later. The guidance stays concrete without getting rigid. Leslie suggests thinking about what is reasonable instead of defaulting to a single standard. She then names the principle directly: fair is not the same as equal. The conversation uses that idea to make room for age and for treating each child individually around technology. When the focus turns to Owen, the youngest child who becomes upset and accusatory, Leslie asks how that behavior lands for Karen. Karen says it makes her feel like a bad parent. Leslie pushes back firmly and says that a child’s anger is not what makes someone a bad parent. That moment matters because it changes the emotional frame before any problem solving begins. The episode stays with assessment first, then points toward the next stage of figuring out what to do. The closing message is simple and steady: say what you mean and mean what you say. The tone is warm, direct, and emotionally attentive throughout. The session leaves Karen with a clearer lens for her children’s different reactions and a calmer way to approach the next round of technology limits.

As heard by us

A calm reminder that tech limits work best when they fit the child in front of you.

Karen's parenting session frames a familiar tech fight with a useful point: fair does not always mean equal. Three children, three reactions, and the parent in the middle has to read each one differently.

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Need a better way to handle screen-time fights with three very different kids?

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