ill-advised by Bill Nighy · EYEPOD Studios

Help! My Horse is Ignoring Me

October 30, 2025·27 min·2 clips

Bill Nighy read the word genius next to Bob Dylan's name in a newspaper, bought his first album in Croydon, and threw his suitcase out a window to run away to Paris.

This episode of "ill-advised by Bill Nighy" features the actor answering listener-submitted questions about life's awkward dilemmas. Nighy hosts the show, framing it as a refuge for the socially clumsy who seek unprofound advice. A listener named Tom from London asks if there is a maximum age for a first tattoo. Nighy, who admits he has never considered his own body "worthy of decoration," observes that tattoos now seem like a collective compulsion for those under 30. Miranda records her question from the bath, asking how to politely decline social invitations. Nighy confesses he is "world class at saying no" and finds declining events increasingly delightful. A listener from Mongolia owns the only Land Rover Series Two in the country and notes his horse has started ignoring him. Nighy suggests the listener may have inadvertently offended the horse and recommends trying a conciliatory box of chocolates. Ingrid from Edinburgh asks for the best way to cook eggs, prompting Nighy to detail his precise egg preferences, including a four-minute boil. Jerry Schwartz asks how to use Bob Dylan's music to navigate life. Nighy shares that hearing Bob Dylan at age 14 radically changed his life and soundtrack, even inspiring him to run away from home. He recounts a story where a tour manager gave him a harmonica Bob Dylan had played on stage, which he now keeps displayed in his home. The episode includes a playlist titled "She Tried to Love You," featuring songs by female artists like Phoebe Bridgers and Joni Mitchell. Nighy introduces a new "archive" for hated words and phrases, with current entries including "beverage," "moist," and "hot drink." He reads an excerpt from the novel "Moderation" by Elaine Castillo, about a content moderator in Las Vegas. The episode closes with a clarification that the correct pronunciation of his surname is "Nighy" with a faint, fading 'a' sound at the end. The tone is wry, self-deprecating, and conversational, as Nighy meanders through anecdotes with dry humor. Listeners who enjoy witty, rambling monologues about minor life absurdities and cultural asides will appreciate this episode. Those seeking direct, actionable advice or structured interviews might find it too digressive.

As heard by us

A horse question becomes a dry, elegant detour through taste, manners, and mild chaos.

Bill Nighy turns a horse complaint into a dry, wandering answer that moves from temperament to taste, with a few odd rules of thumb along the way.

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Why you'd press play

When your horse is giving you the cold shoulder, Bill Nighy takes a long way round.

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →

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