Welcome to Night Vale · Night Vale Presents

278 - How to Solve a Murder

November 15, 2025·29 min·2 clips

An angel billionaire is found dead in a locked library surrounded by a venomous snake, a ceremonial dagger, and a book of dirty limericks.

A composition book becomes necessary. The host stops the murder-solving lesson so Dana can get the right black and white marbled notebook, because the instructions matter even when the case has already left normal behind. Witchcraft makes the same point with less patience. Esteban's hobby comes with a warning: follow the steps exactly, because one small change can turn a pink berry into a very active black hole. The science corner keeps an impressive straight face. Kangaroos start as an animal fact, then become pure forward motion, free of memory, regret, and self-reflection. Business seems fine with this. Their refusal to look inward helps them gamble, rise through politics, and outrun species that pause to think. Death barely interrupts the hopping. A kangaroo spirit keeps moving through space-time until theoretical physics suggests the first ghost to return to its origin will bring the end of all things. Then, politely, the murder lesson resumes. Step two is making a murder board, so now the case needs yarn, glossy photographs, newspaper clippings, poster board, glue sticks, and probably more than one Michael's visit. Sleep does not belong to this method. The board requires hours of pacing, coffee, and mumbling, which makes investigation feel like a craft emergency. Around the episode, the frame stays busy. Jeffrey Cranor announces Europe live dates in Edinburgh, Manchester, London, and Amsterdam for Murder Night in Blood Forest. Alice Isn't Dead returns too. The cold open points listeners to new April episodes, written by Joseph Fink, produced with music by Disparition, and starring Jessica Nicole. The closing adds another mystery: Unlicensed, an L.A. noir-style Audible series about unlicensed private investigators whose small jobs lead toward a larger conspiracy.

As heard by us

A deadpan murder how-to that keeps adding yarn, coffee, and cosmic nonsense.

The episode takes a murder investigation and plays it almost like a straight faced how to. It moves from a composition book to a murder board, then keeps piling on yarn, glossy photos, clippings, glue sticks, coffee, and sleepless pacing.

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Why you'd press play

Need a murder how-to that treats yarn, coffee, and kangaroo logic like part of the case?

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