The Motyv Podcast · Shayden J. Bertagnolli MS LMFT Men's Mental Health Expert

The Motyv Podcast Episode 22 | Finding Purpose and Rejuvenation

·37 min

Host Shaden Bertinoli and therapist Blake Altum explore the modern compulsion for constant busyness and its impact on presence and purpose. They examine how this drive often serves as an avoidance of stillness and genuine connection, framing the conversation around personal rejuvenation. The discussion is prompted by their producer, Candice, who observes many people struggle with a subconscious identity tied to being perpetually busy. Blake details his highly structured morning routine, which he has followed for 20 years, involving waking at 6 AM, a specific hydration practice, prayer, scripture study, and a 90-minute gym session. He explains his day is segmented into focused periods for self-care, work, and then unstructured family time in the evenings. Shaden references research indicating the average attention span is now less than four seconds, taking about 22 minutes to refocus after a distraction. The hosts discuss the concept of the "compound effect," where small, disciplined habits create exponential personal growth over decades. A key insight is that busyness is often a form of worry, where people believe constant activity will solve problems, whereas clarity often arrives during rejuvenation. Blake reframes activities like mountain biking or playing cards with his daughter not as unproductive downtime but as essential, rejuvenating connection. They challenge the listener to track how different activities, like social media versus quality time, affect their sense of rejuvenation on a scale of one to ten. The hosts note that people, especially women, are often praised for their busyness, which can condition a guilt response to rest. Shaden emphasizes that true liberation comes from asking "what do you want?" rather than focusing solely on eliminating problems. They argue that laziness is often just avoidance, while intentional rejuvenation is a purposeful act that strengthens relationships. Blake admits he dislikes going to the gym but views it as essential "medicine" that enables his mental clarity and presence for the rest of his day. The conversation concludes with the perspective that everyone is capable of change and that rigid self-labels can become psychological prisons. The tone is conversational, candid, and reflective, blending personal confession with practical life coaching. The style is educational but informal, featuring a deep dive into one host's personal habits to illustrate broader psychological principles. Listeners interested in productivity systems, mindfulness, or breaking cycles of burnout would find valuable frameworks here. Those seeking highly produced narrative storytelling or debate-driven content might find the casual, meandering format less engaging.

As heard by us

A loose, practical conversation about busyness, presence, and discipline as a steady habit.

The discussion treats busyness less as a virtue than as a dodge from presence and stillness. It keeps circling back to phones, distraction, non-negotiables, and the idea that discipline becomes part of a person over time.

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Why you'd press play

When busyness starts looking like productivity and you realize it may be keeping you from stillness.

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