I DON’T KNOW HOW TO HOG TIE ANYBODY 🥴

July 4, 2020·1 hr·3 clips

The hosts argue that refusing to wear a mask is nothing like real oppression — and compare anti-mask protesters to people protesting bar closures.

The episode opens with Kay and Mar joking about their inconsistent release schedule and committing loosely to Fridays. Kay celebrates National Caesar Salad Day, having eaten three Panera Caesar salads that week using two separate accounts for a buy-one-get-one deal. Mar recounts going into the office after working from home and jokes about quitting her job. The hosts briefly discuss white kids being kicked out of homes for supporting Black Lives Matter and pivot to calling Donald Trump a white supremacist and pedophile. They discuss Ghislaine Maxwell's arrest, calling her Epstein's madam, and firmly state Epstein did not kill himself, pointing to suspicious circumstances around his death. Mar describes a workplace encounter with a customer who unnecessarily specified her previous lash technician was African-American, which Mar immediately challenged, nearly losing her composure. The hosts discuss COVID-19 shutdowns returning to Pittsburgh and Allegheny County, mocking anti-mask protesters and a real protest movement to keep bars open with signs reading 'Bar Lives Matter.' They explain that liquor stores legally had to remain open during lockdowns due to the risk of fatal alcohol withdrawal. The hosts then break down the August Alsina and Jada Pinkett Smith scandal in detail, including Alsina's claim that Will Smith gave him a blessing for a non-romantic relationship with Jada, Will's denial, and Jada's upcoming Red Table Talk response. They speculate that the relationship was sexual and reference a previous Red Table episode where Jada seemed to acknowledge an open arrangement. The conversation shifts to Erica Badu selling a perfume reportedly made from her vaginal secretions, which sold out in twenty minutes. Damon Dash walking off a production set when asked about Aaliyah is discussed, with the hosts noting his emotional reaction seemed suspicious. They reference a Key and Peele sketch about a rapper storming off an interview set. The R. Kelly interview is brought up, specifically his claim that he does not know how to hogtie anyone, which the hosts found unintentionally funny when they later saw a hogtying scene in the film 'Intruder' starring Meagan Good and Michael Ealy. Pop Smoke's posthumous album is praised, though the hosts criticize the cover art. The episode's most personal segment involves a discussion about whether adoptive parents should tell children they are adopted, which leads Mar to share that she grew up believing one man was her father until age 17. Her biological father told her the truth at a bus stop while under the influence of drugs, and she later confirmed it through DNA testing in February of that year. She explains that family members had known for years and had agreed to wait until she was 21 to tell her, partly because her biological father was struggling with addiction. Mar reflects on the experience with a mix of understanding and lingering confusion, noting she only recently connected with her biological father and discovered she has a 31-year-old brother and a 19-year-old younger brother. The hosts conclude that parents should tell adopted children the truth early, and the episode closes with brief commentary on children in immigration detention and anticipation of Melania Trump writing a tell-all book.

As heard by us

Quick, messy duo banter that lets the detours do the work.

Gray Area starts in motion, with Kay and Mar trying to keep a simple weekly promise while the talk slips toward National Caesar Salad Day, Panera praise, and an interview story that opens into a Key & Peele detour and the line about never hogtying anybody.

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Why you'd press play

Press play if you want a ridiculous rant that keeps swerving and still lands punches.

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