The Anxious Truth - A Panic, Anxiety, and Mental Health Podcast · Drew Linsalata

When Coping Skills for Anxiety Go Wrong | EP 332

·26 min·1 clip

Counting breaths can be an experiment in not fighting, not a way to erase panic.

1. The Anxious Truth episode 332 focuses on coping skills that “go off the rails” when anxiety is internally generated. 2. Drew Linsalata is the creator and host, a therapist in New York, a former anxiety sufferer, and a three-time author on anxiety. 3. The episode asks what coping is for when it helps and when it becomes part of the problem. 4. Drew separates internally generated anxiety from externally generated stress by contrasting fear of body sensations and thoughts with work, school, family, and money stress. 5. He says externally generated anxiety can point to actions like getting a different job, taking leave, finding tutoring, or going to couples counseling. 6. He argues that internally generated anxiety centers on the body, scary thoughts, intrusive thoughts, and big emotions. 7. He says coping becomes a control strategy when the goal is to calm down on demand or stop “scared body things.” 8. He warns that repeated control attempts reinforce the belief that the internal state should never happen. 9. He describes “trigger, cope, trigger, cope” as a cycle that can leave someone feeling they barely survive each episode. 10. He says popular tools like tapping, ice packs, lavender oil, special diets, grounding, and five-four-three-two-one can become part of that loop. 11. He introduces “conditional okayness” as the pattern of saying “I can do X as long as” a coping condition is present. 12. His examples include picking up kids from school with cold water and mints, going to Thanksgiving with a safe person, and staying home alone only if a neighbor is nearby. 13. He says a flight with Xanax can be a limited example of conditional okayness for someone who flies three times a year. 14. He connects excessive ritualized coping with the phrase “high functioning anxiety,” which he says he does not like. 15. He says therapists may initially resist this view, then understand it once the mechanism is explained. 16. He reframes coping as brave experimentation, such as counting ten breaths or counting backward by threes without expecting panic to stop. 17. The tone is explanatory and repetitive by design, with Drew looping through the same distinction from several angles. 18. The format is a solo monologue with occasional direct address to listeners and examples from his own past use of coping tools. 19. This fits listeners trying to understand anxiety recovery and why control strategies can backfire. 20. This may not fit people looking for a quick list of universal coping hacks.

Listen to the show on

Apple Podcasts Spotify

Play clips from this episode More from The Anxious Truth - A Panic, Anxiety, and Mental Health Podcast