05 - The Alchemist - Ben Johnson

·31 min·2 clips

Lovewit's Spanish-dressed return collides with Mammon, Surly, Kastril, Ananias, Tribulation, and officers at the door.

1. The Alchemist's Act 5 centers on Lovewit arriving at his door after weeks of rumors about the house. 2. Face, Subtle, Doll, Sir Epicure Mammon, Surly, Kastril, Ananias, Tribulation, and Dapper each matter because every one of them exposes a different part of the con. 3. The episode asks whether Lovewit can sort out the truth when every visitor describes the same house in incompatible ways. 4. Lovewit questions the neighbors about 'daily' and 'nightly' traffic, and they list coaches, ladies, gentlewomen, citizens' wives, knights, oyster women, sailors' wives, and tobacco men. 5. He worries that Jeremy sold the hangings and bedding, then imagines bawdy pictures, dancing dogs, and other bait for gulls. 6. The neighbors say Jeremy vanished five or six weeks earlier, which makes Lovewit fear that something worse happened inside. 7. A smith hears a cry 'like unto a man that had been strangled,' and Lovewit uses the story to pry open the door. 8. Face appears as the butler and explains that the house was 'visited' by plague, even though he claims the door stayed shut for more than three weeks. 9. Face says a cat caught the infection, that he covered it away at night, and that he planned to use rose vinegar, treacle, and tar to sweeten the place. 10. The neighbors contradict him by insisting they saw gallants, coaches, and a woman in a French hood, so the door becomes a contest between eyesight and alibi. 11. Mammon and Surly arrive calling the residents 'cousiners' and demanding to know where the gold flagons, brass pots, and promised treasure went. 12. Kastril follows by shouting about his sister, the 'bawdy doctor,' and the 'cozening captain,' turning the street into a second accusation. 13. Ananias and Tribulation come next, denouncing the house as 'Abominacion' and 'this cave of cozenage,' while they argue over the goods stored in the cellar. 14. Dapper is gagged, bound, and sold a story about spirits in the house, then sent away with a promise of better fortune and a 'fly' charm. 15. The comic center of the episode is the packing of trunks, money, jewelry, and clothing while new knocks keep interrupting every deal. 16. Face and Doll trade notes about the widow, the parson, and the next errand before another interruption breaks the plan. 17. The script plays like a farce of entrances, keyholes, and shouted warnings, with each new arrival forcing a quick change of story. 18. The energy is fast, verbal, and tightly comic, with repeated insults, asides, and reversals replacing any single narrator. 19. Listeners who enjoy classical stage comedy, scam plots, and rapid-fire reversals will get the most out of it. 20. Listeners who want a modern interview format or a spoiler-free ending will probably skip it.

As heard by us

A brisk doorstep scene of complaints, disguises, and promises of fairy treasure.

The Alchemist turns on a noisy doorstep, with Lovewit taking stock of the crowd at his house and wondering what his knave has been doing in his absence.

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Why you'd press play

Play this when you want a con that keeps changing masks in plain sight.

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