Do Sex Toys Ruin Sex? Myth Vs. Fact

·32 min·3 clips

Dr. Justin Lehmiller debunks myths that sex toys desensitize users or signal relationship problems.

The episode begins with Dr. Justin Lehmiller introducing the topic of sex toy myths, such as desensitization and relationship issues. He welcomes guest Venus O'Hara, a pleasure educator and professional sex toy tester from Spain. Venus explains the concept of erotic pathways, arguing that variety prevents dependency on any one stimulation method. She shares a personal story about breaking a rabbit vibrator and learning to orgasm without internal stimulation, which expanded her toy review capabilities. The conversation addresses how to introduce toys in relationships without triggering insecurity, with suggestions like using blindfolds or Tenga Eggs. Venus and Justin discuss how sex toys are for everyone, regardless of gender or relationship status. Venus recommends beginner toys for solo play, including the Satisfyer Pro 2 and wand massagers, and explains the versatility of rabbit vibrators. For partnered play, she advises against certain couple toys due to pain issues and emphasizes foreplay with toys. The hosts talk about toy compatibility, noting that not every toy works for every body, and experimentation is key. Venus highlights the lack of instructions with toys and the role of pleasure educators in demonstrating multiple uses. Tips for new users include creating a sensual atmosphere and training the erotic mind through audio erotica or guided masturbation. The episode covers price and quality, with Venus warning against cheap, unsafe materials and sharing a personal injury from an irreputable brand. Safety advice includes using condoms with insertable toys and avoiding dangerous designs. Venus promotes her new book, 'Orgasmic Manifestation,' which includes exercises for consecrating sex toys with intention. The episode concludes with resources for listeners to find more information.

As heard by us

A practical look at sex toys, pleasure myths, relationship insecurity, and getting started.

Sex toys become a useful way into the myths and worries that can gather around pleasure. Dr. Justin A. Miller, a social psychologist and research fellow at the Kinsey Institute, talks with Venus O'Hara, a pleasure educator, author, and content creator, about desensitization…

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Want a calmer way to think about sex toys, from first purchase to bringing them into a relationship?

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