No Son Horas · Chumel Torres

No son Horas con Chumel Torres I Miércoles 08 de Abril 2026

·45 min·3 clips
Supreme Court minister María Estela Ríos explains property rights: 'the right to property, yes it is, but not the right to property.'
1. 'No son Horas con Chumel Torres' is a daily comedy-news program on Grupo Fórmula covering Mexican and international politics with satirical commentary. 2. Host Chumel Torres and co-host Gabriel Mimí present the April 8, 2026 news bulletin with recurring banter and audience interaction. 3. The episode's core thesis is that institutional failure — at the UN, the Supreme Court, the Senate, and the CFE — is a reliable source of material for absurdist comedy. 4. The UN Committee on Enforced Disappearances activated Article 34 of its convention for the first time ever, warning that Mexico's 132,000+ disappearance cases may constitute crimes against humanity. 5. The Mexican government, through President Sheinbaum's administration and Foreign Relations Secretary, rejected the UN report as 'tendentious and biased,' a response Chumel compares to a student claiming the exam was wrong rather than admitting they didn't study. 6. Chumel notes that forced disappearances under AMLO doubled compared to the Calderón administration, adding political context to the UN finding. 7. Rapper Tekashi 69, identified by his legal name Daniel Hernandez, claimed to have shared a Brooklyn prison cell with former Venezuelan president Nicolás Maduro, describing him as having hygiene problems while reading the Bible and watching Telemundo. 8. Tekashi 69 offered as proof a SpongeBob plush doll he said was autographed by Maduro, which the hosts treat as genuinely credible evidence given its specificity. 9. Supreme Court Minister María Estela Ríos attempted to explain the legal distinction between limiting and depriving property rights during the court's debate over the UIF's power to freeze bank accounts without judicial orders. 10. Her televised explanation devolved into circular repetition — 'the right to property, yes it is, but not the right to property' — which the hosts play back and mock in detail. 11. The Senate's official attendance register showed Alito Moreno led absenteeism with eight unjustified absences; 67 senators accumulated 181 total unjustified absences from September 3 to March 5. 12. The PAN bloc led absenteeism with 70 failures across 22 legislators, followed by the PRI with 46 and Morena with 42, undermining all parties' claims to accountability. 13. A 3-meter, 300-kilogram crocodile was captured on Bacocho Beach in Puerto Escondido after a storm dragged it into the tourist area; civil protection personnel transported it by quad bike to a lagoon. 14. Chumel jokes that this is the first time in Mexican history an apex predator of that size was relocated rather than appointed as governor or given a plurinominal senate seat. 15. Mexico City Metro's Lost Objects Office reported 453 items abandoned on Line 4 between January and March 2026, including a wheelchair, a master's degree, and a funeral urn containing ashes. 16. The CFE issued a national alert about criminals impersonating CFE workers with fake uniforms and fabricated LinkedIn profiles, leaving notices on Friday afternoons demanding payments of 5,000 to 20,000 pesos. 17. The episode alternates between news segments and extended off-topic banter, including a discussion about gothic bars in Mexico City, a DJ who performs under the name 'Post-Mortem Ejaculation,' and electricity bill habits. 18. Chumel's style is conversational and digressive; he frequently interrupts the news summaries with personal anecdotes, breaking the fourth wall to address listeners and crew by name. 19. Viewers who enjoy political satire in Spanish, absurdist news commentary, and Mexican current affairs will find this episode engaging. 20. Those who prefer structured journalism, bilingual content, or news without extended off-topic tangents are less likely to stay through the full runtime.
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