Murder Dice - A 5e Dungeons & Dragons Podcast · Dungeons and Dragons

Murder Dice - The Gates Ep.48

·1 hr 14 min·4 clips
Naya’s thunder clap reveals a “big boat” with “a half dead pirate” and arrows flying at them.
The episode starts with a long, suspicious tangent about a small Mexican market on the other side of the street and the kind of storefront that feels off enough to make people joke about fronts and laundering money. The hosts riff on weird little businesses that seem to drift around in a legal gray fog. Then the scene shifts back to the sea fight. A pirate boss sweeps his arms and brings in two more ships. Each boat has its own ugly little personality. One pirate throws a dagger at Ubu, but the roll is awful and it misses. The first ship fires a cannon and misses too. Its shot still makes a mess, because the blast hits a human zombie shark and turns it into bloody drift. The second ship lands a cannon hit on the party's portable boat. The damage is only one point, but the crew hammers on the word transom like it is the funniest thing in the world. The last ship does not have cannons, so the danger comes from an archer in the crow's nest instead. That arrow whistles through the space between Ubu's legs and spooks him anyway. The table keeps circling back to how heavy the boat is and whether that weight is slowing everything down. Someone jokes about anchors and legs. The combat math keeps happening under the jokes. The show treats the fight like a shared disaster everyone is trying to survive together. The banter is profane, quick, and constant. Rules talk gets tangled up with nicknames and half-finished thoughts. The pirate scene never gets polished into clean drama, and that is part of its charm. It feels like a home game where everybody is already in the room and nobody is pretending otherwise. Near the end, the conversation jumps from ship damage to engineering school, summer work, and the usual reminder that Excel is something you end up using no matter what. The hosts sign off by thanking listeners for sticking around through inconsistent release timing and hinting that the next stretch of episodes should come faster. It lands like a tired grin after a chaotic session.

As heard by us

A rowdy pirate scrap that keeps breaking into jokes, then snapping back to danger.

Murder Dice turns this stretch into a loud pirate fight on the water, and the charm is how the table keeps sliding from combat into banter without losing pace.

Read the full review in PlayNext →

Why you'd press play

A pirate ambush, a wounded boat, and a fight that keeps lurching forward.

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →
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