Murder Dice - A 5e Dungeons & Dragons Podcast · Dungeons and Dragons

Murder Dice - The Gates Ep. 46

·59 min·3 clips

Naya hexes Cerberus's wisdom and lands two attacks for 42 damage.

It starts with Bezos getting dragged. David opens the session, calls in his slayers, and the room immediately piles onto Jeff Bezos, turning him into a bald, evil-laughing, puffy-jacket target for a whole stretch of rich-guy jokes. The thread keeps moving. They joke about workout changes, confidence, and the simple fact that getting stacked does not automatically make anybody pretty. Then the table wanders off again. Someone pulls up a bathroom calendar full of weird old words, and the show happily stays in that side road long enough to land on "Dossie Peagle" and "Whip Jack" like they are normal parts of a conversation. The riff only gets sillier from there. The group strings the words together, jokes about Dracula, and keeps pushing the bit until it becomes a chain of one-up nonsense. Eventually the dice come back. Cerberus gets its turn, the right head leans in, and the monster goes for Naya while the table keeps talking over the action just enough to make it feel like a real room. The fight stays scrappy. There is talk of terror squats, mushroom jokes, and the kind of loose, half-formed reactions that keep actual-play combat feeling alive instead of staged. A vampire RPG mention slips in too. Someone brings up a vampire game where long life means you can no longer remember all of what has happened, and the comparison hangs there for a second as the table talks through how memory would blur over time. The scene never gets tidy. Even when the rules chatter lands, it lands in the middle of jokes, corrections, and quick confirmations, which is basically the show's engine. By the end, the party still is not headed the right way. David calls the pause, says they might back up next time, and the room shifts into thanks for the listeners and patrons. It closes on the same busted affection it started with, a long-running home game that never bothered to clean itself up for the microphone.

As heard by us

Bezos jokes, oddball wordplay, and a fight with Cerberus keep the table lively.

PlayNext keeps Murder Dice in a loose, profane register here, opening on Bezos jokes, body-image digs, and the odd vocabulary of Dossie Peagle and Whip Jack before the dice pull the scene back toward danger.

Read the full review in PlayNext →

Why you'd press play

If you want Bezos trash talk before a dog-headed fight, start here.

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →

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