Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships · Multiamory | Pleasure Podcasts

569 - Why is Everyone So Tired of Dating?

·1 hr 13 min·3 clips

Dating burnout is everywhere—we're digging into why and what to do about it.

The episode opens with the feeling that dating has become tiring for a lot of people. The hosts frame the conversation around burnout rather than blame. They ask what the data says about the rise of dating apps, then connect that rise to the emotional cost of always being on the hunt. One thread is safety. The conversation acknowledges that many people want to know who they are dealing with before they agree to meet. That can mean preferring a known quantity from the past. It can also mean using apps more carefully instead of treating them like an endless funnel. Another thread is how people screen each other now. The panel talks through wanting to see someone's vibe in motion. They want to hear the person's voice. They want to notice how a face moves while someone talks. They even imagine a short monologue as a useful test. The joke keeps going into an elaborate selection process. There is talk of moving people through different rounds before a traditional date ever happens. The idea is funny, but it also points to how cautious dating has become. The group seems aware that people are inventing systems because the default one feels exhausting. The conversation also comes back to the practical cost of dating. One reason people stack dates, or avoid doing too many of them, is simply that getting ready takes time. That detail lands because it makes dating fatigue feel ordinary rather than dramatic. It is not just emotional burnout. It is logistics, appearance, scheduling, and effort. The hosts keep the tone light, but they do not brush off the frustration underneath it. They recognize that online dating can be useful when used well. They also recognize that the same tools can make people feel overexposed or worn down. That tension sits at the center of the discussion. The episode ends by looping back to the basic question of why dating feels so hard right now. The answer is not reduced to one cause. Instead, the hosts stack together safety, time, apps, and the pressure of evaluation. That makes the conversation feel less like advice and more like a shared attempt to name the problem clearly. What comes through most clearly is that dating fatigue is not a sign of failure. It is a predictable response to a system that asks for constant judgment and constant availability. The episode keeps that idea human. The hosts also leave room for humor. Their exaggerated date-screening ideas give the discussion some bounce. But the humor never fully escapes the seriousness of the underlying question. If dating has become tiring, what part of the process is actually draining people? A listener leaves with a better sense of how the hosts think through that mess. They do not pretend there is one right answer. They look for the practical pieces, then admit where the practical pieces still fall short. That is the episode's shape from start to finish.

As heard by us

A grounded look at why dating feels exhausting.

The episode treats dating burnout as a real tradeoff: apps can be useful, but safety and uncertainty never really leave the picture, especially in a big city.

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Why you'd press play

If dating fatigue is starting to feel real, start here.

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →

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