Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships · Multiamory | Pleasure Podcasts

555 - Reclaiming Spirituality as a Queer, Polyamorous Person with Brian G. Murphy

·1 hr 4 min

Brian G. Murphy talks with the Multiamory hosts about queerness, polyamory, and ritual. He begins from a personal pattern: annual Fire Island trips that gradually came to feel less like a vacation and more like a pilgrimage. That shift matters because queer people have been coming there for decades to grieve, celebrate, and move through the same life events he was experiencing. Naming that history changed the meaning of the trip. The hosts keep asking what makes something feel sacred without making it rigid. The conversation turns to tea ceremony classes and the unexpected way a repeated practice can grow into a community. Brian describes how people of different ages can end up linked by a shared rhythm and a deeper purpose. That intergenerational pull stands out as one of the clearest parts of the discussion. They compare that feeling with queer meetups and poly cocktails, which can be fun and inspiring without always carrying the same depth. The point is not to rank one gathering above another. It is to notice what ingredients make belonging feel larger than the room. Brian also talks about his book Love, Yeah! Monogamy and the chapter on ritual. He explains how routines and habits can be turned into rituals on purpose. The hosts follow that thread into the difference between repetition and meaning. Their framing stays careful and nonjudgmental. No one pretends there is a single correct path to spirituality for queer or polyamorous people. Instead, they keep returning to agency, context, and the specific communities people build for themselves. The tone is reflective, a little playful, and grounded in lived experience. By the end, the conversation has made a strong case that ritual can be something people make rather than inherit. It also leaves room for the possibility that ordinary gatherings can become special if they are tended with intention.

As heard by us

Queer spirituality here feels like a practice, not a slogan.

This episode treats queer and polyamorous life as something built through ritual, repetition, and shared naming, not as a fixed tradition handed down intact.

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Why you'd press play

For when you want a queer, polyam-friendly take on ritual, belonging, and family.

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →

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