Modern Love · The New York Times

He’s Gay. She’s Straight. They’re Newlyweds. (Encore)

March 25, 2026·38 min·2 clips

Jacob explains why 'gay' is the only label that fits even though his soulmate is a woman.

Modern Love revisits a conversation with Jacob Hoff and Samantha Greenstone, a couple first noticed through the New York Times Vows section. Their wedding details made them stand out, and the episode comes back to them with an update. Anna Martin asks about the night they slept together and whether it changed how Jacob understood himself. He says it did not change his identity. What changed was the life forming around it. The couple talk about the honeymoon period and the doubts that followed. They describe the uneasy shift from romance into a shared future that has to hold up under ordinary life. Jacob worries about whether a relationship with a woman can fit all the expectations people attach to marriage. Samantha worries about whether she is pulling him away from being with a man. Both circle the same fear from different sides. How long can this last? Anna keeps the conversation open enough for those doubts to breathe. She does not push them toward a tidy lesson. The strength of the piece is the way it lets contradiction stay visible. The marriage is loving, but it is not simple. The affection is real, but so is the strain. The episode ends with a happier update: Jacob and Samantha now have a one-month-old son, and they say he has deepened their bond. They also say they are constantly playing him soundtracks from their favorite Broadway musicals. The ending does not wipe away the earlier uncertainty; it just places something steadier beside it.

As heard by us

A tender Modern Love episode about a gay man, a straight woman, and the marriage they keep choosing.

Modern Love revisits Jacob Hoff and Samantha Greenstone, newlyweds whose marriage resists the tidy labels people often reach for: he is gay, she is straight, and their relationship grows out of friendship, desire, and a shared decision to keep going.

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Why you'd press play

A newlywed love story that keeps testing what commitment looks like when the script does not fit neatly.

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →

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