Good Inside with Dr. Becky · Good Inside

When Food Feels Scary: Eating Disorders in Kids & Teens (Early Signs & What Helps)

February 24, 2026·41 min·2 clips

Dr. Erin Parks surveyed 50 teenagers in eating disorder treatment: zero wanted parents involved—but when asked why, every teen said 'I don't want them to know how bad it is.'

The conversation begins with the feeling many parents have when food stops being simple and starts feeling scary. It names the stress of caregiving first, then turns toward the particular load that comes with watching a child or teen struggle around eating. The episode does not treat eating-disorder behavior as random or purely oppositional. It tries to understand what the behavior is doing for the child. That shift is the center of the discussion. The episode talks about how restricting, obsessing about food, or binging can work as a way to regulate emotion. For some kids and teens, the behavior can briefly make stress feel smaller or more manageable. The episode keeps that idea in view without excusing the harm it can cause. A repeated theme is that many children experiencing these behaviors are carrying the same emotions other kids do, just at a louder volume. The episode also points to genetic predisposition as part of the picture. That matters because it helps explain why one person might find relief in not eating while most people would simply feel hungry, grumpy, or hangry. The behavior is framed as something that works for a while, until it stops working. The tone stays warm and direct. It feels like a parent-centered conversation that wants to reduce shame before offering a better model. Instead of only asking why a child would do this, the episode asks what the behavior is doing for them. That makes the topic feel less mysterious and more understandable. The episode also keeps the parent in the frame. It acknowledges the impulse to react with, stop doing that, and it treats that reaction as understandable. From there, it moves toward a more useful question: what is happening underneath the food behavior? That question gives caregivers a place to begin without pretending the situation is simple. The pacing is measured. The episode spends time on emotional context because that is what makes the eventual reframing usable. That slower shape may feel right for a topic this loaded, though it also means listeners looking for a quick tool kit will need a little patience. By the end of the discussion, the listener is left with a clearer picture of eating-disorder behavior as a coping strategy that can start in relief and end in danger. The episode asks parents to look beneath the surface and to respond with more steadiness than fear. It offers a way to think about early signs without flattening the child behind them. And it keeps the focus on understanding first, then helping.

As heard by us

A steady, humane frame for one of parenting’s hardest and most loaded worries.

The episode treats food and eating disorders as one of parenting’s most loaded worries, then takes time to ask what kids and teens may be getting from restricting, obsessing over food, or binging.

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When food and eating start feeling loaded.

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