Feeling Good Podcast | TEAM-CBT - The New Mood Therapy · David Burns, MD

Personal Work with our Beloved Rhonda, Part 2

July 28, 2025·1 hr·5 clips

Rhonda confesses she wishes she didn't feel so guilty about comparing her cancer to others' suffering.

This episode continues a personal therapy session with host Dr. Rhonda Borowski, conducted by Dr. David Burns and therapist Matt. Dr. Burns is the pioneering creator of TEAM-CBT and author of the bestselling "Feeling Good." Rhonda is working through feelings related to her recent cancer diagnosis and radiation treatment. The session focuses on applying specific TEAM-CBT techniques to address her distress. Rhonda's initial negative emotion scores include guilt at 95% and anger at 85%, stemming from thoughts like not having a right to complain. The hosts guide her through a "positive reframing" exercise to find value in her guilt, sadness, and anger. They identify positives like her respect for others' suffering, her love for her friend Jack, and her passion for life. The core technique demonstrated is "externalization of voices," where Matt and David role-play Rhonda's negative thoughts so she can argue against them. One key negative thought challenged is, "You don't have any right to complain about your symptoms because lots of people have it worse." Matt argues against this by stating he wouldn't hold that standard for others and that people care about Rhonda and want to support her. David shares a story of telling a cranky medical resident she had permission to be irritable, which transformed their interaction. Rhonda also confronts the fear, "I'll never get back to my former self," and counters with the idea that change is constant and she can love her new self. A memorable insight is that the problem is not the difficult life events but the self-criticism about having normal human reactions to them. David emphasizes that the antidote is self-love and accepting all parts of oneself, even irritability. By the session's end, Rhonda reports dramatic shifts, with scores of zero for sadness, guilt, and feeling defective. She expresses joy in accepting a "new increased irritability plan" and recognizes gains in compassion from her experience. David compares the session's emotional transformation to a past session with a woman named Marilyn, who had stage-four cancer. The tone is deeply conversational, supportive, and educational, blending therapeutic technique with genuine personal connection and humor. Listeners interested in the practical application of cognitive behavioral tools for emotional distress will find this compelling. Those seeking a lighthearted or purely informational podcast might find the intense, personal focus less engaging.

As heard by us

A direct TEAM-CBT discussion about whether pain has to be silenced just because someone else may have it worse.

Episode 459 keeps its focus on a practical TEAM-CBT exchange about Rhonda's treatment-related frustration. After the empathy phase, the discussion moves to the idea that someone else may be suffering more, and whether that should quiet her complaints.

Read the full review in PlayNext →

Why you'd press play

When your pain feels "not bad enough," this conversation pushes back.

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →

Listen to the show on

Apple Podcasts Spotify

Play clips from this episode More from Feeling Good Podcast | TEAM-CBT - The New Mood Therapy