F*ck Buddies: A Sex and Dating Advice Podcast · Dain Miller & Niall Spain

Tiktok Made Me Do It

·47 min·3 clips

The hosts say the real answer to "Am I the biggest you've ever had?" is to not ask it.

1. F*ck Buddies: A Sex and Dating Advice Podcast makes "Tiktok Made Me Do It" into a set of listener questions about sex, dating, and damage control. 2. Dave Miller and Niall Spain host as co-presenters, and they matter because they answer the questions directly and keep interrupting each other with examples from their own lives. 3. The episode asks what to do when a 16-year-old breaks a bed during sex and fears strict parents will notice. 4. The listener says her parents are "very strict" and follow a "no dating until graduation" rule, so she usually goes to her boyfriend's house instead of inviting him over. 5. She says the bed was "probably five or six" years old, and the wooden plank or slats under the mattress snapped straight down the middle. 6. The hosts argue that hiding sex does not stop teenagers from having sex, and it leaves them without basic knowledge about safe sex and consent. 7. Dave Miller mentions hearing claims like "you can't get pregnant if you stand up right after having sex," while Niall Spain says he was once taught that periods were called "pyramids." 8. Their advice for the bed problem is to lie about a TikTok trend, because the parents already "hate TikTok" and would understand a random dance or flop mishap. 9. They also describe other cover stories, including bringing in a friend as a witness or staging a loud book-drop into the room. 10. The next question shifts to penis-size insecurity, where a listener asks, "Am I the biggest you ever had?" 11. The hosts say that question is a trap because the asker wants one answer and may not actually want the truth. 12. Their preferred workaround is to say, "you're so fucking big," which sounds like affirmation without forcing a ranking. 13. Dave Miller says he has been called a "model cock," and both hosts treat that as a better compliment than a forced size comparison. 14. They also say the question usually creates a minefield because the partner now has to choose between honesty, lying, or dodging. 15. Another listener asks whether being a "sleepy guy" ruined a date after two bars, hand-holding, kissing, beers, and music at her place. 16. Dave Miller and Niall Spain think the real problem may have been looking drunk or like he passed out, especially after he stayed in another room and then kept trying for a kiss in the morning. 17. The tone is chatty, blunt, and heavily improvisational, with the hosts constantly using personal stories about beds, hostels, and awkward mornings. 18. The format is advice-driven panel banter, and the hosts bounce from listener scenarios into their own memories of teenage sex education and bad sleeping arrangements. 19. People who like frank sex advice, dating etiquette, and messy personal anecdotes will get the most out of this episode. 20. People who want polished therapy language or low-explicitness conversation should skip it.

As heard by us

A filthy advice show that keeps the jokes sharp and the guidance useful.

F*ck Buddies is a sex and dating advice podcast hosted by Dave Miller and Niall Spain, and its appeal comes from how quickly the two hosts spar over listener questions and online prompts.

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Why you'd press play

A broken bed, a blunt verdict, and zero patience for insecure questions.

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →

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