Drunk-ish - A Sobriety Podcast · Stefanie Wilder-Taylor

How Not to Take a Polygraph with Jonathan Todd Schwartz

·59 min·3 clips

On May 8, 2016, he says he took cocaine, drove to a polygraph, and failed it badly.

Stephanie opens by introducing Jonathan Schwartz as a former Hollywood financial powerhouse, a recovering addict and advocate, and a redemption seeker. He answers with a childhood that begins in the Catskill Mountains and runs through abandonment when his father left, leaving his mother to work three jobs and keep the family afloat. He says that trauma went untreated for decades. The conversation then moves into the gambling addiction that came first. Stephanie keeps pressing for the moments that matter, including the waitress he later called for cocaine. Jonathan explains that she became his supplier and that the use turned daily and secret. He describes waking in sweat, canceling meetings, and living with heart disease while trying to keep everything hidden. The episode makes clear that his wife did not know about the cocaine. It also makes clear that secrecy had already been building through the gambling years. Jonathan says he was chasing money to pay back clients while numbing himself at the same time. He talks about not knowing his authentic self, which gives the conversation its center. The marriage stays in the background, but not in a tidy way. He explains that he and his wife were separating during the cocaine period and that he had moved into another home. He says the earlier gambling addiction and the behavior around it already made him a poor husband. He also says he committed infidelity. Stephanie keeps the exchange moving with direct follow-up questions rather than letting him slide past the hard parts. Jonathan responds in the same plain language, without dressing anything up. The story keeps circling back to double life, shame, and the way addiction can be both escape and self-destruction. He says his thoughts were intense enough that an attempt could have happened. He also says his three sons, his wife, and his mother were reasons to live. By the end, the conversation has moved from a list of bad choices into a clearer picture of how damage, secrecy, and survival sit in the same body for years. Stephanie closes by thanking him for a beautiful story and a beautiful message. The final note is gratitude, but the episode has already done the heavier work of naming what it cost to get there.

As heard by us

A direct recovery story about addiction, secrecy, and the cost of a double life.

Jonathan Schwartz tells a recovery story that starts with a father who left, a poor childhood, and slides into gambling, cocaine, infidelity, and a hidden double life.

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Why you'd press play

A raw recovery conversation about addiction, secrecy, and the cost of a double life.

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →

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