Doing Well: The Wellbeing Science Insights Podcast · Life Management Science Labs

Ooi Sze Jin: Exploring the Positive Impact of Acts of Kindness on Well-being | Doing Well #65

·36 min·3 clips

Sijin reveals how a meditation practice transformed her feelings from bitterness to neutrality towards someone who deeply hurt her.

This episode explores the science and practice of kindness with guest Sze Jin Ooi, founder of A Kind Place, which supports neurodiverse individuals. Host Marie fills in for Lu Ngo, guiding a discussion on how acts of kindness impact personal and collective wellbeing. Ooi approaches kindness by first being kind to herself to build capacity for kindness toward others. Ooi defines wellbeing as a holistic concept encompassing physical, mental, spiritual, social, financial, and environmental health. She describes acts of kindness as intentional, often selfless actions meant to benefit others or oneself, though she notes they naturally make the doer feel good. A study from about a decade ago on undergraduate students found that happy people tend to be kinder and that performing kind acts increases one's sense of happiness. Ooi shares an example from her work where a client with neurodevelopmental disabilities, initially aggressive, became cooperative and engaged after trainers consistently showed her kindness. She suggests simple acts like holding a door or texting a friend can significantly impact someone's day. In the workplace, kindness from employers, like a boss offering support or small gifts, makes employees feel appreciated and boosts morale. Ooi recommends managers model kindness by asking about well-being and focusing on positive feedback, such as through "kindness letters" where employees write appreciative notes to colleagues. She explains kindness is contagious due to the "feel good" feeling and subsequent gratitude, like when a bus driver waits for a runner. To cultivate kindness, Ooi personally practices a formal loving-kindness meditation, which involves wishing well for a loved one, oneself, and finally, someone with whom you have a difficult relationship. She notes the second and third steps of this meditation can provoke resistance, but persistence can lead to neutral feelings toward someone who previously caused hurt. Ooi distinguishes between kindness and obligation by examining one's internal dialogue, suggesting the word "should" indicates obligation, while "want" signals genuine kindness. She is passionate about encouraging society to slow down, advocating for breaks and a better work-life balance, as exemplified by her own refreshing three-week holiday. The episode concludes with Ooi sharing her LinkedIn details and her organization's website, A Kind Place, for further connection. The tone is conversational and educational, blending personal anecdotes with practical advice and scientific references. Listeners interested in positive psychology, mindfulness practices, or improving workplace culture would enjoy this episode. Those seeking a highly structured, debate-driven, or purely data-focused analysis might find it too anecdotal or gentle.

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