Doree Shafrir On The Out Of Control IVF Train

April 7, 2026·44 min·4 clips

I had this misconception. I was like oh well I will just do IVF. As though that were this sure thing.

Doree Shafrir, journalist and podcast host, describes how she spent her twenties and thirties feeling like a late bloomer, experiencing life FOMO about marriage, children, homeownership, and career milestones. After meeting her husband Matt on Tinder at 35 and marrying at 38, they discovered his low sperm count meant IVF was their only option. Neither had insurance coverage for the procedure. Their first retrieval of 15 eggs yielded only one genetically normal embryo, a crushing wake-up call about the realities of IVF. That embryo did not implant. Doree describes the financial strain of paying over twenty thousand dollars per cycle without insurance, becoming expert at zero-percent-interest credit card transfers, and feeling ashamed about continuing despite mounting debt. She discusses how well-meaning friends offering miracle baby stories and false assurances made her feel worse, while those who simply said they were sorry and available to talk provided genuine comfort. After two and a half years, five egg retrievals, three embryo transfers, and 98 episodes of their weekly IVF podcast, Doree finally got pregnant at 41. She describes being consumed by miscarriage anxiety well into the pregnancy, unable to feel safe until the 24-25 week viability mark. The episode also briefly addresses the broader landscape of infertility experiences and refers listeners to a companion episode featuring listener stories.

As heard by us

A frank IVF conversation about uncertainty, testing, and the strain of not knowing.

The episode treats IVF as a hard choice shaped by medicine, money, and timing. It works best when it stays close to the waiting and the uncertainty, from the shots and egg retrieval to the lab work and genetic testing that can cut a hopeful pile of blastocysts down to one normal…

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Why you'd press play

If IVF has turned your calendar into a stress test, start here.

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →

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