Ep 213: Anxiety Always Makes Sense (with Dr. Becky Kennedy from Good Inside)

·52 min·4 clips

Anxiety comes from something unknown in the future coupled with our underestimation of our ability to cope.

Laura Tremaine introduces the episode by marking the four-year anniversary of the COVID-19 pandemic, recalling the sudden shift to lockdown in March 2020. She explains that she recorded a bonus episode with Dr. Becky Kennedy during that time, focusing on anxiety, and decides to re-air it because the advice remains applicable today. Dr. Becky Kennedy is introduced as a clinical psychologist, parenting expert, and author of 'Good Inside'. The interview begins with Laura asking Dr. Becky to introduce herself and her background. Dr. Becky defines anxiety as discomfort in the body and links it to childhood experiences where feelings were ignored. She presents her core framework: anxiety arises from uncertainty combined with an underestimation of one's coping ability. Laura responds enthusiastically, noting she hasn't heard anxiety described that way before. Dr. Becky discusses self-talk techniques, suggesting people notice and label anxiety to create distance from it. She recommends personifying anxiety and greeting it with phrases like 'hi, anxiety'. The conversation explores managing anxiety through validation, with Dr. Becky emphasizing that feelings need to be understood, not necessarily changed. She introduces the concept of scheduling 'worry time', such as five minutes per hour, to journal worries and give them full attention. Laura asks about anxiety that seems to lack an obvious cause, and Dr. Becky asserts that anxiety always makes sense, even if the reason isn't immediately clear. The discussion shifts to parenting during the pandemic, with Dr. Becky advising parents to validate children's observations about changes and establish clear roles. She stresses that worrying is the parent's job, not the child's. Laura asks about handling parental meltdowns, and Dr. Becky highlights the importance of repair and making sense of such moments for kids. They also discuss creating structure and agency for both children and adults, with examples like documenting the pandemic or personal projects. The episode concludes with Laura thanking Dr. Becky for her insights.

As heard by us

A compassionate episode about anxiety as a signal, with grounded language for living alongside uncertainty.

Anxiety is treated here less as an enemy to defeat than as a signal asking to be understood, especially in the unsettled aftermath of the COVID-19 pandemic.

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Why you'd press play

When anxiety keeps asking you to prepare for a danger you cannot fully solve, press play.

Read the full recommendation in PlayNext →

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